Oh, My Lack of Common Sense

I do a lot of driving for work...A LOT of driving. I fill up my tank of gas maybe twice a week, which sucks a little when I think of the days when I used to fill up my gas tank once every two weeks.

So picture me at the gas station last week leaning over to my purse to grab my wallet as I get ready to fill up my gas tank. And as I dig through my purse it becomes increasingly obvious that my wallet is not there.

It's in a different purse. At home. Dammit.

Fortunately, I had enough gas to get back to my office but I definitely did not have enough gas to make it all the way back to my house. I was feeling slightly panicked.

I called Mindy who works in Utah County like me--no answer. And then I emailed her. No answer. (Subsequently, we're not speaking to each other because she still refuses to answer my questions. Weird, right?)

I racked my brain.

And then I did what I was hoping I wouldn't have to do. I leaned over to my buddy John who sits next to me and motioned for him to come over. "John!" I whispered, "Come here!"

John, is one of my favorite co-workers. We go out to lunch every Thursday and he's constantly introducing me to tasty restaurants I would never have thought to try. We laugh all day long. I coach him on the basics of sports (which may be the most hilarious thing ever) and he instructs me on what shoes to wear with what pants. And no, he's not gay. Just one very metrosexual man. His eyebrows are perfect and he's always sporting a very fetching tan. In a nut shell, I love this guy.

But still, I was just about to ask John for money. I was feeling supremely awkward.

"John," I begin. "Would you mind..." I trail off as my whispers become almost uninteligible.

"What?"

And then in a rush I said, "I left my wallet in my other purse and ironically my car is almost out of gas and I was hoping you could spot me some money so I could at least fill up my gas tank enough so I can get home tonight. I promise to pay you back tomorrow! I swear I have cash in my wallet, it just conveniently happens to not be with me. Did I mention that I left my wallet in my other purse? And the spindle showing my gas level is teetering closely to below the red line? And I promise you I will pay you back tomorrow...I'm just so embarrassed. All I need is $5 and I'll make it home..."

And on and on and on.

John looked equally uncomfortable. I haven't felt this embarrassed in a long time.

"Well, actually, I do have some cash. It's in my car though. You'll have to come to the parking lot with me."

This was not exactly what I wanted to hear. I was really hoping he'd just pull some money out of his pocket and we could make the transaction as quick and painless as possible.

So I followed John to his car. Along the way he picked up a fellow who was headed out to a meeting with John. This guy (whose name I don't know) gallantly began walking to the back seat so I could have the front. He was assuming that I was coming along to their appointment. I didn't know how to say that actually I wasn't going with them, I was just following John out to his car so he could give me some money.

Even as I write these words, I cringe. If someone were telling me this story secondhand I would think they were being a tad overdramatic, and yet I cannot stress enough how embarrassed I felt.

"Oh, you don't have to take the back seat," I said. "I'm just picking something up...from John's car."

By now John was relishing this newfound power that he was now my official sugar daddy. He kept chirping in my ear with little teasings like, "Don't spend it all in one place," and "I wonder how far you can go with $5, I'm sure to China!"

John grabbed his wallet and pulled out a wad of bills and handed me $5. The guy we had picked up exclaimed, "Wow! What do I need to do to get John to give me cash?!"

Ugh. You can be a tool like me.

Like I said, I paid John back his $5 and included chocolate as well. I'm sure it's something we can laugh about now....

Can't Lose With A Lemon Cupcake!

My ward had a 4-ward chili cook off and dessert bake off last Monday and laughingly, I signed up. I just figured I'd bring a dessert but Kaylin had the bright idea that I make something lemony with candied lemons. So here are my lemon cupcakes with lemon cream cheese frosting and candied lemons on top. I can't lie, they were a super hit and I WON the bake off! It was a Phillips clean sweep when Kaylin's name was called as the winner of the chili cook off (although let's be real, she can cook anything. This was a no brainer.) I have to admit, I was pretty proud of those cupcakes. I'd never baked anything that had looked so pretty.

It's Starting to Snow...This Makes Me Smile

I know I'm supposed to curse the colder months. It means getting sick and having to stay inside. And sometimes, it means an epic car crash in the middle of Oregon. But I LOVE it when it snows. I love how peaceful everything feels when the snow is falling. I love how the sky lights up in the middle of the night and turns kind of pink. I love that the snow means cute hats, coats, and boots. I love that it means I get to experience all of the seasons in the year. I love that the for a brief moment, all I can think of is how beautiful the world is. And it leaves me so full of gratitude.

It's Good to Have Friends

Hanging out with my good friend Rachel. Highlight of the evening (for me) was when Rachel said, "Didn't I tell you about the text? I didn't? Okay, let me tell you...."

Steel-Toe Boots

It's no secret that I like my job and that I like construction workers and engineers. Let's be real, construction workers can be so funny, especially when they're trying not to swear in front of a "lady" like myself.

This morning I strapped on my steel-toe boots because I had to go onto the work site. Again, let's be real, I wear heels at every possible chance. This may explain the puzzled looks I got from my roommates this morning.

The View from My Bike

The view from my bike overlooking the valley. I really do love Utah in the fall.

Oh, and a picture of me. In case you forgot what I look like.

BYU Football! (It's Been Years...)

I haven't been to a BYU football game since college--I probably don't need to tell you how long that has been! I sang the Fight Song with pride, watched the instant replays, and girl talked with my friend Annie while keeping one eye on the field. Periodically, I would jump up in the middle of something she was saying so I could yell at the field. I felt a little bad, but who knew I had such a competitive edge?

The good news is that Annie and I are good luck. BYU won after two very disappointing and embarrassing losses. We'll probably have to go to more games in order to help the cause.

All Things Relate Back to Anne Shirley

Last night when I got home, I found my sisters Kaylin and Alicia, Alicia's roommate (I think her name is Megan), and Mindy all sitting on the couch watching TV.

Kaylin turned to me. "I wish you had been here earlier. Troy (our landlord) came over and asked us for advice and I was weirded out."

Turns out Troy had dropped by for a little house business and then wanted to lament over the fact that a guy he knows who is about our age proposed to his then-girlfriend with a pearl and not a diamond. According to Kaylin he said, "Can you believe that? A pearl! I saw the ring and it was just this round thing sitting on a ring. Seriously, can you believe it?"

Kaylin and Mindy were nonplussed. They didn't exactly see the problem, but that could have something to do with the fact that we so rarely see engagement rings these days. Although I think he has a point...a pearl?

"Well," I pointed out, "Gilbert Blythe did propose to Anne Shirley with a pearl."

Kaylin just stared at me, confused and a little irritated because she knew I was being retarded, but Alicia definitely knew. As the only other redhead in the family, she knew the Anne of Green Gables reference.

And then Alicia's roommate said, "Who's Gilbert Blythe and Anne Shirley? I guess I don't know these people."

Ha! This Is Funny!

My sense of humor came back to haunt me on Saturday.

My cousin Tracy just bought a house and I spent Saturday helping her move and painting her kitchen. Tracy is so organized, all of the boxes were nicely labeled and eventually we had a good system going as to where to put each box.

It came as something of surprise when I saw a box with my handwriting on it--I'd forgotten that I had helped her pack a few things when she moved out of her first house last November. (Read here if you'd like a good story from when she moved out.)

And then it came as even more of a surprise when I saw what I'd written:
Fragile: must be French.

Please tell me you've seen A Christmas Story.

Good Times

Hanging out with my friend Carlye while up in Boise last weekend. Don't ask why we're sitting on a chair that says "The Naughty Spot." It's an incredibly long story. Oh, wait, that's never stopped me before...

A Few Late Bday Pics

I had two parties this year for my birthday--one with my cousins and one with my friends. I guess this is the perk when you reach the fantastic milestone of 30. I just liked these pictures and thought I would post.

More proof that I cannot take anything in life seriously. Check out that bruise on my arm!

Summer brought a new addition to our family--a bbq grill. We're grilling machines these days. Kaylin gave me an apron with the phrase "I turn grills on." She didn't realize its full meaning until I pulled it out of the plastic. I thought it was hilarious.

The world's best chocolate cake...and I don't even like cake!

With some great friends, Rachel and Annie.

LOTOJA--Or The Thing I Am Lusting After

Saturday, September 11 was one of those epic adventures. No, I didn't do anything interesting or impressive. But my friend Russell did! And I was there to witness it. Seriously, I'm still marveling over it.

The LOTOJA race is a 206-mile bike race from Logan, UT to Jackson, WY. Russell rode 206 miles in 13 hours, suffered 2 bike flats, and 1 exploding tire. This man is THE MAN. It was just so exciting.

Kaylin and I and his friend Adam were his support crew. We basically drove to each feeding station and made sure he had food to get him through to the next stop, changed out his water, and basically acted as his cheerleaders.

This is just outside of Afton, WY and is was SO.FREAKING.COLD.

Although I felt like a bit of a voyeur, I had to take a picture of this super tall guy. Look at him! He just towers over everybody. Turns out this guy is Shawn Bradley, one of the tallest NBA players...or at least that's what I'm told.

One of the feeding stations. We were such amateurs helping Russell--we put his food in grocery bags and fumbled to give him what he needed when. Instead, other people showed up with shower caddies with food neatly laid out. We looked ridiculous next to them. The other sad thing was that a couple of times Russell actually beat us to the feeding stations. We felt terrible. Not only did he arrive at one more milestone in his race only to discover that his friends weren't there, but time was a-ticking, and he needed his food so he could get back on the road.

(If you're wondering why he actually beat us to a feeding station, imagine 2000 bike riders with 2000 (at least) support crews. Traffic was not always quick and efficient. Sometimes cars were diverted to a different route so the riders could have the road all to themselves.)

I imagined that as we reached each feeding station we would have an hour or two to kill while waiting for Russell. Not so. There was barely any time for us to rest because Russell was always hot on our heels. With each destination we would get out of the car, load up our food and water, and walk to the feeding station. Each time, Russell would show up mere minutes later. Even though it was fast-paced and rushed, it was also so cool to see that Russell was just killing it on the ride. He just brought it.

Consider me support crew, maybe Team Mom. I took a picture of Russell at each feeding station. I truly thought that with each passing station Russell would look more and more fatigued as the day went on. I was so wrong. He smiled big for each picture and always looked ready for more. Again, I was just wowed.

When we finally got to drive alongside the riders it was kind of exciting to see. Riders race in packs because they can draft off of each other which makes them go faster.

An unexpected flat. Good thing we were right behind him when it happened! We were able to quickly reach him and pull out the bike pump.

Again, just all smiles. I would have been pissed if I'd been struck with such bad luck. (Oh, wait, I was, and it wasn't even a race, it was a ride. Shows you I have a bad attitude.)

The End! Almost 24 hours later (in the car, no less!) we pulled into our driveway. I don't know how I made it to the end without falling asleep at the wheel because my eyelids were definitely having a hard time staying awake.

Russel is such a rock star. I know this sounds cheesy and a tad overdramatic, but I was just so inspired by this ride. Maybe it was the energy of the race, but I wanted to be out there so bad. I'm going to do it next year I've decided. I won't do the whole 206 miles, but they do do a relay and I think I can put together a team for that. Training starts...now.

Russell's going to be on my support team.

Just A Regular Day At Work

Sometimes I get lucky. Last week my boss invited me along on a helicopter ride to take aerial photographs of the freeway. Granted there was a professional photographer to the real pictures, but I think I got a couple good ones anyway.

I have a real fear of heights and flying (NieNie anyone?). I guess the good thing is I had to face my fears to a certain degree. But by the end I actually felt kind of comfortable. Result!

Hey, These Questions Matter

I'm hanging out with in Washington with my parents and all of my sisters this Labor Day weekend. We're boring people. We eat, watch movies, and have actually just spent the last hour and half watching YouTube videos. Check out The Battle at Kruger if you want to see something really gnarly.

If you didn't know, my sister Hillary is hilarious. She kills me.

Friday night my mom was telling me about her trip to the podiatrist because her feet were hurting.

"So, Melissa, I went to the podiatrist because my arches have been killing me. The first thing they did was do an ultrasound on my foot."

My mom was about to go into more detail when Hillary interjected, "Did it have a heart beat?"

My Submission for the Darwin Awards

I am forever trying to find and maintain balance. And forever failing at it! I guess it's the process of this life. Since starting my new project, I have felt tired all of the time and have had trouble going to the gym like normal. All I want to do is sleep. And thus my life has achieved imbalance.

It must be the mono.

So I thought a nice thing to do would be to start taking a multivitamin...at least it would be a small step in the right direction. And maybe I wouldn't feel so tired all of the time? Right?

I know...it's a pipe dream, but whatev. I didn't think it would hurt.

So yesterday was the big day. I popped my vitamin into my mouth on my way to work. This was followed by breakfast which consists of oatmeal, craisins, brown sugar, and milk (my FAVE breakfast).

However, as soon as I finished eating my breakfast I felt queasy. Like the throw up kind of queasy. It came strong and it came fast, and too late, I was on the freeway. Never did I regret something as much as I did that stupid multivitamin. The inevitable was coming and I was trapped in my car prayng for just 30 seconds more. And another 30 seconds for me to get off at the next exit.

But too late. I was almost there--pulled over on the side of the road with my car door open--when I threw up in an impressive display of projectile gymnastics all over my dashboard.

Needless to say, it was something of a bleak Monday morning as I slowly got out of my car and cleaned it up with a spare blanket in my car. I debated turning around and just going back home, but I'm a responsible adult these days. People need me.

The real issue now is that I'm afraid of multivitamins.

Being Real...For A Second

Maybe you're like me and you pick yourself apart from time to time and find every single thing that's wrong with you. I find myself doing it more often these days. If I went into all of the reasons why I do it...well, we'd be here all day. But lately, I've found myself thinking that I'm not as capable or likeable as I once was. Sometimes it just eats away at you.

For example, there are about a million things I'd like to change about myself. I have no idea why. I'm just an average girl...I just often think it's not enough.

Last week I was at the gym and was watching myself in the mirror as I did lunges off of the step from step aerobics class. For the record, that's one of the hardest things I do at the gym and I hate them. In no time I am breathing heavy and gasping for air.

This time as I was doing it I couldn't help but scrutinize every part of myself while doing these lunges. I was right next to the mirror and could see everything. I felt kind of low.

And then I noticed something--these lunges are 3 minutes long and as I said they are excruciating. But as I watched myself in the mirror, I saw how easily I was doing it. In my mind, my muscles ached for reprieve, but outwardly, my body seemed to handle it with no problem whatsoever. I didn't even seem winded.

I felt kind of proud and grateful for what my body can do. It made me look at myself a little bit differently. I didn't realize how much I am capable of.

30, Flirty, and Fabulous

Mother Nature gifted me with a pretty good hair day for my birthday.

Frankie the Freaking Wolf Spider

Picture this, it's Saturday night and Kaylin and I have just gotten back from Bear Lake. We're tired and sunburned. We want nothing more to do than stay in and veg. The good news is that Kaylin had just bought Season 3 of Veronica Mars (which, if you have never seen this show and enjoy sharp, witty dialogue, you're missing out).

Kaylin is putting the DVD in when suddenly I hear the most awful, blood-curdling scream. It rang in my ears.

And there it was, Frankie the Freaking Wolf Spider. For reals...it was scary looking. It had legs to here. I wanted it gone.

About a year ago, this guy came to my house named Karl. We called him Big Karl (I think) because he was this big brute of a guy. 6' 5", 300 pounds...massive. As he lounged on our couch I saw a massive red welt that was scabbed on his leg. Around the welt it was red as well. He said he'd been bitten by a wolf spider and had had that sore for about 2 months. Maybe he was leading me on, but all I could see when I saw Frankie the Freaking Wolf Spider was Big Karl's big welt. I couldn't get it out of my head.

I looked at Kaylin and expected her to kill it. She looked at me and expected the same thing. We were clearly at an impasse.

But Kaylin was adamant...she was not going to kill Frankie. And so the job fell to me. I wasn't thrilled at the prospect. But I grabbed a shoe and prepared for the worst.

But I couldn't do it...seriously. I stared that gigantic spider in the eye (all 8 of them) and I could not kill it. So I did what any self-respecting woman would do. No, I didn't scream, I grabbed a water bottle and planned on drowning it.

To which Kaylin replied, "Are you really going to drown it? Seriously? Why don't you just kill it with your shoe?"

Yeah, I am officially a weenie.

But I tried to rally. And I pointed that water bottle at the spider just as it ran away behind the TV and Kaylin may have screamed a little. I went on the offensive and saw it behind the TV. I bravely pointed my water bottle at it again and went to town, drenching that massive spider in water. I felt pretty satisfied it was dead until Kaylin screamed again. Frankie the Freaking Wolf Spider had run to the other side of the TV. The thing that I had been drowning? An already dead spider.

So then I decided that I needed something stronger than water--poison. Okay, I grabbed a bottle of Shout fabric cleaner and aimed to wage war on Frankie. Except that freaking wolf spider just ran off...practically skipped across the room! I got him with the "poison" and it didn't even phase him. Kaylin's screams were getting louder, by the way. I swear, Frankie was outfitted in head-to-toe armor. It actually made me a little more nervous. If he can withstand Shout fabric cleaner, what else can he endure? And yes, I realize the absolute idiocy of that statement.

Finally, I succumbed and just did what I should have done from the beginning. I grabbed my shoe. By this time Frankie was up on the wall. All I would need to do is pound my shoe really hard against the wall and bam! He'd be dead.

Except, really, knowing that he was practically made of steel, I'm sure he wouldn't be dead on the first try.

I steadied my hand and raised my shoe up.

"Don't miss, you've only got one chance," Kaylin said.

"I know!" I hissed.

Oof...I missed.

I cursed under my breath.

And then finally I had had enough. Let Frankie go down to sleep with the fishies, I thought as I slammed my shoe on the wall with force I didn't know I possessed. Like Zeus the Greek God. And I got him...finally.

I think Kaylin screamed one more time. The good news is, Frankie the Freaking Wolf Spider is dead.

Mother Effing Moths

Excuse my French...but we have mother effing moths in our house. Which didn't seem to bug (he he) us so bad until we discovered that they lay eggsin your food. Oy. I'm dying just thinking about it.

So Kaylin and I spent about five hours removing all of the food from our cabinets, wiping everything down in vinegar, and throwing out about 8 garbage bags of food. Oh, the joys of a bug infestation!

Out On The Road

To be honest, I really hate this picture. I'm in need of mascara and some overall grooming. But...I thought I would take more pictures out on my bike and yet I haven't. Fail.

New Examples of My Awesomeness

Today I plugged in the headphones into my computer and started streaming the radio. I had a list a mile long of things I needed to do at work and I was in the zone. And then my co-worker Lee walked up to me and asked me what I was listening to. He was kind of smirking...which isn't all that unusual for him...but still. There was an air about him.

I pulled out my earbud but could still hear my music...it was kind of loud, too loud. And then I realized, I had not completely plugged in my headphones all the way. Everyone could hear my music.

Thank heavens I wasn't listening to something embarrassing, like Dr. Laura.

...

The other day, I got a phone call from one of the safety guys at work letting me know that a publicly owned vehicle had been involved in an accident on the freeway.

"What's a publicly owned vehicle?" I asked him, because in my mind a publicly owned vehicle was...ah, it doesn't matter. I was way out in La La Land on this one.

"Um," he said, sounding confused. "A publicly owned vehicle is a car that is...um...owned by someone of the motoring public."

Oh.

And then he laughed. For a while.

Pioneer Chic Is the New Black

This story makes me laugh. I know I've alread told loads of people and even posted it on my Facebook status, but I can't stop laughing about it.

People who know me know that the whole idea behind a pioneer reenactment really weirds me out. I consider myself blessed to have grown up in Washington and not subjected to a pioneer trek as a youth. I don't think we would ever have been friends.

I know...a pioneer trek brings a whole new perspective and appreciation for what the pioneers went through just to get to the Salt Lake Valley! I know...it deepens and reaffirms your testimony. But trust me...I appreciate it already. I don't want to have to reenact it.

I think it's the dressing up in pioneer garb that really gets me. I do not want to wear a long calico dress and a bonnet in 100-degree heat pulling a hand cart all with the intention of learning a life-changing lesson. Not ever. (Although I know, KNOW, that if the Lord ever blesses me with a husband, I am going to be compelled to go on one of those treks. Someone's going to ask me and I won't be able to say no, because even though I am LDS, I suffer extensively from good old-fashioned Catholic guilt.)

I know...I have a bad attitude about everything.

And so I was telling my friend yesterday at work how I think pioneer treks are weird.

To which she replied, "Well, you're kind of dressed pioneer chic today...in a good way, of course."

I tried to process this, but I kept hearing words like "pioneer," and "you look like one."

She had a point, and now I just feel self conscious. My dress was brown linen, there is a ruffle down the front just above the waist. But I also happened to be wearing brown, flowered espadrilles with a seriously high sole...so high that I'm sure there are some super models out there that would say, "Whoa, get back. I think I'd walk easier in spike heels."

And so I laughed...so loud and hard. I don't think she had any idea why it was so funny to me.

Do Not Judge The Picture Above

So my blog background which I loved...LOVED...the one with the lined school paper and pretty marigold / green colors was shanghaied by the blogging website I stole it from. So sad. So I picked out a new blog template which subsequently took my beautiful picture of Bath, England and skewed it up.

I only say don't judge the picture at the top because I know a lot of you out there are all professional photographers and I just can't compete. I know I took the picture at 2:00 in the afternoon and that the bright light flattens all of the images...but, I like that picture of the Oregon Coast. No, it's no Bath...exactly. I've been to some amazing places in my day.

Little Red Riding Hood, My Life On A Bike

I've been wanting a road bike for a while now. Spinning classes are great but I've kind of grown weary of them, to be honest. In truth, I'm a terribly judgmental student. If I don't like an instructor I'm severely critical. Yes, you can call me arrogant. But there are a lot of crappy gym instructors out there who think because they're skinny they'd make a great fitness instructor. No...that's not really true.

Okay, I'll get off my soap box, until I find something new to harp about.

So Kaylin, Mindy, and I bought bikes. It's actually been super fun and SUPER intimidating. I thought I'd hop on my bike and have no problem. That was before I became acquainted with the dreaded clips that clip your shoes into your pedals. I promptly discovered that I was not that great at clipping out.

And so...I've fallen multiple times off of it.

However, Kaylin, Mindy and I signed up for our first road race--the Little Red Riding Hood. Okay, it was more of a ride than a race. As I learned, there's a difference.

Check out my bike...how sexy is that? I know you can't really see it, but I think she's pretty.

That rack was only big enough for two. Kaylin squoze into the back with her bike.

Pre-ride. If only I knew then what I know now. It's funny how when I embark on something new I typically make a million mistakes before I "get it." What's even funnier is this principal applies to just about everything in my life...which should tell you that I'm hopeless.

The line to the bathroom. Seems kind of long, but I snapped this shot just before the next rush of females came rushing in.

Here is where the excitement begins. It was my first ride and I felt a little overwhelmed and rushed. I had this overwhelming need to prove myself as a legitimate rider. What's ironic is that the Little Red Riding Hood ride was merely a ride...nothing else. There were girls on beach cruisers, mountain bikes, road bikes...and they were all just cruising. They were just riding. They didn't care.

And yet, I felt like I had to kill it. I was actually doing fairly well until I hit a railroad track on an underinflated tire. (I know this now after much soul searching and asking the nice people at REI.) As a result, my tube popped just as Kaylin flew by and when I realized my tire was flat, Kaylin was long gone. And I was all alone on a long, deserted road approximately 15 miles from my destination.

Dude...sometimes my life just sucks.

I walked for about 2 miles as girls zipped by. I was so pissed that my tire busted on me. Until a nice lady stopped and showed me how to change my tire. She even rode with me a little bit of the way.

By the way, I was still pretty pissed.

When I finally made it to "home plate," Kaylin looked like she was going to pass out from relief. I actually felt really bad seeing the look on her face. She had no idea where I was and had heard a rumor that a girl had dislocated her shoulder along the ride. She had visions in her head of it being me.

But we all finished. No, it was not a stellar performance but it's all about the experience. And you have to admit that it's a pretty funny story. I can say that now--a month after it happened.

See! I even had a smile on my face! Mostly it was just relief that it was over because I was over it.

On to the next adventure. I'd like to try a century someday--100 miles. I'll really need to train for that.

Mmmm...

I got a parting gift on Friday after eating out for lunch--food poisoning. Needless to say, I am not my best self and can only tolerate toast and ice cream. But...I did make these blueberry muffins this morning, and they were delicious.

Hey, You Guys! My Trip to Oregon...

Last year I went on a trip to England . . . this year, to Oregon. Doesn't really seem fair, right? Actually, no, it was amazing and a lot of fun. My grandparents have a ranch in Oregon and I spent many summers at the ranch. This year, Kaylin and I decided to venture out. We went with our cousins Sarah and Tracy to Seaside, Cannon Beach, and Astoria before heading down to the ranch. I tell you what, a vacation was exactly what I needed. I actually woke up this morning feeling refreshed. I don't think that has ever happened.

Anyway, if you've seen The Goonies, maybe you'll recognize these rocks. They play a predominate role in the movie. I gotta say, I love that movie. We watched it again at my grandparents' and I couldn't stop laughing.

This is Haystack Rock. We visited it at low tide which gave us so much more to look at--we ventured out onto the rocks and checked out the sea life. I was surprised at how much we saw--starfish, sea anemones, and crabs.

Sorry to gross you out, but these starfish are spawning right now...they eek their "goodies" out into the water which are then received for reproduction. I don't know how to put this any more delicately. But check how many starfish are clinging to the rocks! Usually when I think of starfish I think of them being dried out.

We made a stop at a candy shop to pick up salt water taffy. So good.

Does this look unladylike to you?

This is inside the Astoria Column...basically it's just a tall tower that overlooks the city. It had a pretty spectacular view. A lot of stairs to climb up but nothing compared to Bunker Tower in Boston!

What? This isn't Talk Like A Pirate Day?

Inside one of the biggest busts of all time--the Tillamook Cheese Factory. Was it wrong of me to expect more from it? Clearly I have a problem with too high of expectations. This picture is basically it of the cheese factory--this is all I saw. Even the cheese didn't taste that good.

No, really, they just offered me cheddar and pepper jack. I can get that at the store.

Okay, the ice cream was good...although not as good as Umpqua ice cream. If you've been to Oregon, you'll know that stuff is off the hook.

We finally got to the ranch after an amazingly long drive in pouring rain. Bleh. This picture is of one of my favorite spots on the ranch...this little covered bridge over a creek. It's not even on my grandpa's property but I love to look at it every time.

We traveled to so many beaches on this trip. What is it about the water that is so calming and soothing? I tried (in vain) to get some action shots of me in the water so I could update my facebook picture with something cute. I failed miserably. I think I'm too old to be cute. However, this picture of Hillary is ridiculously cute.

We found some cool rocks that we tried to walk across until we came across not one, but two couples who were aggressively making out. Talk about awkward.

We were really lucky when we got to Winchester Bay (one of the many beaches we traveled to). Usually when we go to the coast it's grey and overcast. This time the clouds practically opened up and the sun came streaming down. It was sunny and warm...and just perfect.

We also traveled out to Heceta Head...another beach. This was another one of those gloriously beautiful days. I couldn't believe how lucky we were to have two days of such good weather.

I just wanted to swim but nobody swims in the Oregon Coast. Ice cold, baby. But it was so nice I was thisclose to just jumping in.

And on to my favorite part of the trip--Cape Perpetua. One of the highest points you can get to to overlook the beach. I couldn't believe this view.

Seriously...take a look. Can you believe this view?

Kaylin and I took a pit stop in Portland before we had to return our rental car. I'm sorry...it was kind of weird. According to two of my co-workers, we went to the wrong part of town, like the part where they give crack away like candy. This man on a bike rode up to Kaylin and me as we were walking around and asked us if the blue grass festival was still going on.

I was confused. "Sorry, I don't know," I said. And then I started walking away. Maybe that was rude? I don't know.

He looked us up and down, not in a skeevy way but like he was offput by our answer.

"You don't know?" He sized us up and down. "You from around here?"

We shook our heads. "No, we're from Salt Lake City."

And then he looked at us again before saying, "Uh huh."

Pause.

"I thought there was something different about you."

Oh, snap!

I blame the bright colors and flip flops we were wearing. If we had been wearing black and had tattoo sleeves covering our arms then we would have been right at home.

And so we come to the end of our whirlwind trip. It was a great time, although my mom and Alicia were sorely missed. It's just not the same when you guys aren't there.